


Alone

by KadeAK (zacixn)



Category: A Hat in Time (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, In which the idea for 'Train Rush' gets its first step, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-02-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:14:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22700800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zacixn/pseuds/KadeAK
Summary: Intended as an inspired, fan prelude to the series of fics by @subconite and @storybook_rift. Set during the production period of the 41st Annual Bird Movie Awards, a year before canon.I recommend reading their works, Necktie, Tipsy, Gone, and Eve, which all take place after this. They are very good, I aspire to that level of angst-writing.-He's alone again, but it's no surprise.
Comments: 7
Kudos: 35





	Alone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [yuminpa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yuminpa/gifts), [TrainRush](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrainRush/gifts).



> Good lord, it's almost Valentine's Day and I decided to write something depressing instead of cutesy. Forgive me? I hope this is up to standards, as usual. Do let me know if I've misspelled something, or made a grammar mistake. I'm not good at spotting those, and this fic's gone through a lot of rewriting.
> 
> I've got one piece of Snatcher art up on my tumblr, if anyone wants to check it out. I'm @Zacixn, and would love to befriend anyone else who's a glutton for sadness like I am.

Tick, tock.

12AM, midnight. Valentine’s day.

The Conductor eyed the clock of his office, barely visible in the darkness of the night. Today would be another Valentine’s day spent relatively alone, and tonight would be another night spent working extensively. The owl had already been at it since the studio’s closing hours, arranging and rearranging his scripts, storyboard work, prop lists, and the like, desperately trying to make this upcoming film as good as it could be. It was effectively a distraction tactic; one the Conductor had used since the departure of his wife. Overworking himself was not particularly healthy, but at least it was productive, and frankly, it’s not like he deserved anything better. Besides, the only way any of his content would end up okay was if he put in the blood to make it that way.

He was tired already. Not just physically, but emotionally too. The director had been up doing the same sort of thing for the past week, staying overtime to finish the lengthier parts of this paperwork. It was all starting to build up, the sleepless nights of stack after stack of rough drafts doing nothing to help the Conductor as he worked, his usually angry scrawl quickly becoming rushed and almost indecipherable. If he pushed himself any longer, he might break, but the owl found himself hardly caring about any of that.

For a little while, the strategy was working. The prop lists for tomorrow’s physical checks were done, and the Conductor had almost finished revising his final script. Things were well on track, everything far ahead of schedule. Of course, though, the peace did not last for long.

Tick, tock.

It was 1AM of Valentine’s day already. 

The Conductor almost wished he had reserved more work for today. There was too little to be done. He’d burned through all of his imperative tasks, and now he was idle. Idle on Valentine’s day, alone in a studio basement. How pathetic.

God, he wanted to drink something so bad. There was probably some hidden stash of alcohol in the office – there always was, for ‘emergencies’. Anything to dull his mind and distract him from his feelings would be much appreciated. Of course, though, he couldn’t indulge. Not today, at least. As much as the initial relief from the stress would help, the aftermath would not. There was too much at stake with these upcoming Bird Movie Awards, and being hungover on set never bode well for production value. So, the Conductor remained painfully sober, painfully lucid, doing his best to will away the demons of his mind.

His best, it seemed, was not enough.

Tick, tock.

Only ten minutes had passed, but they felt like a lifetime. The shadows of the dark office seemed to swallow everything they could grasp, and the Conductor was not spared from their reach. The claws of the dark were intensely lonely, wrapping him in a low and ever-present sense of hollowness and reminding him of how easy it would be to simply… disappear.

The Conductor had wanted to disappear for a while, now.

The world would be better off without his presence, surely. The owls would be thankful to see him go, to have the freedom to find a better supervisor. His family, or whatever remained of it, would be pleasantly surprised to find they no longer had to share a continent with him. As for DJ Grooves, well. Grooves certainly would be ecstatic to take the Conductor’s position of being on top of the movie world. He might appreciate it far more, really. 

Tick, tock.

The Conductor leaned back in his chair. There wasn’t much point to sticking around, in all honesty. Nothing had much meaning to it, anymore. Loneliness had dominated his world, and like an utter peck neck, the Conductor’d severed all possible connections with other birds with his own two hands. He was alone. Nobody cared for him, and that was the bitter truth. No amount of backpedalling now would change that fact. In fact, it was incredibly likely that nobody would ever care for him again.

Maybe that would make disappearing easier.

Tick, tock.

It was getting hard to breathe, now. The darkness was suffocating. Had it always been this dark in the office? Surely not, that would be improbable. He felt sick to his entire core, nausea bubbling in his stomach and sending shivers down his spine.

Tick, tock.

The clock’s ticking was getting ever-louder, an awful gap of silence between each almost-silent progression of time. Echoing, the noises bounced through the room, ringing in the Conductor’s ears.

Tick, tock. 

Maybe he should just stop it all right here? Cut the spiralling short, beat the demons to their objective. Maybe that would make everything so much easier. 

Tick, tock.

If he were to die, how would he do it? Fading into the darkness sounded far too peaceful.

Tick, tock.

Maybe, he could…

Tick, tock.

Tick, tock.

Tick, tock.

2AM, Midnight, Valentine’s day.

The Conductor eyed the clock in the corner of his office. Today would indeed be another Valentine’s day spent alone, but that was okay. After all, the Conductor’d just had an excellent idea, one sure to please anyone who heard it.

He collected his finished paperwork into a neat pile, setting it in a corner neatly. This film might win an award, but the next one would be one to really remember. One to set his creativity free, so to speak.

Everybody loved an explosive finale.

**Author's Note:**

> <3


End file.
